Hard Times No More Relationship Podcast
Allesanda Tolomei- Hard A.K.A. Mrs. Hard of www.mrs-hard.com is your grounded, empathetic, compassionate wellness coach. She shares her experience to help you heal challenging personal and family relationship problems with tried-and-true methods to set healthy boundaries and detach with love.
If you are ready to experience fulfilling, meaningful connections you are in the right place. You can transform difficult relationships and find happiness without putting aside your needs or waiting for others to change. Let people-pleasing and codependence fall away and say goodbye to hard times for good.
Hard Times No More Relationship Podcast
The Art of Balanced Living for Business Babes with Lisa Fonville Ep.-39
I’m super excited to have my good friend, business collaborator, and photographer, Lisa Fonville, on the show today.
Lisa is much more than just a photographer and branding expert—she creates soulful art through deep connections with her clients. Her ability to capture their true essence comes from the journey she undertakes with them before they even step in front of the camera.
In this episode, we talk about:
- What Lisa, as a branding expert, sees women struggling with the most when it comes to self-promotion.
-The secret to keeping your creative fire burning bright while creating a healthier work-life balance.
- Reducing work-related stress, self-doubt, and imposter syndrome, while reminding you that all entrepreneurs feel these feelings, no matter how successful they may appear.
AND SO MUCH MORE!!!
This conversation is especially important for caregivers and female entrepreneurs because having a business is like being in a relationship. If you tend to struggle with boundaries when caring for others, maintaining a healthy relationship with your business can be challenging.
During this conversation we chat about practical tips you can use to nurture your relationship with your biz so that you experience more of the joy and freedom you signed up for when your business was just a dream.
Join us for a soulful conversation:
Don't miss out on our upcoming EmpowerHer High Tea event on July 21st. It’s a wonderful opportunity to connect, learn, and grow with fellow female entrepreneurs. Click here to sign up!
Say Hi To Lisa on Instagram: @hemlockhousephoto
Say Hi to Mrs. Hard on Instagram @Mrs.Hard_TimesNoMore
Discover how to step off the chaos roller coaster and finally have peace of mind.
Sign up for my free 3-day coaching series—Stepping Off The Chaos Roller Coaster: 3 Simple Steps For Anxiety Relief
Hi, I'm Alessandra Tolome Hard, aka Mrs Hard, and this is Hard Times no More, a podcast for people who are tired of struggling with boundaries, people-pleasing and relationship problems. I have overcome some hard times. Within three years, I stopped drinking, my mom died of cancer and my house burnt down in a California wildfire, and those are just the highlights. I have a lot of reasons to be miserable, but I'm not. The truth is, life was more challenging before these events happened. If you are tired of waiting for your circumstances to change to find happiness and peace of mind, you are in the right place. Join me as I share the tools I use in love to transform challenges into assets and interview others about their relationship journeys. Together, let's learn how to have a happy life full of healthy, meaningful relationships and say goodbye to hard times for good. Hey everyone, welcome to the Hard Times no More Relationship Podcast. I'm Alessandra Tolomehard, aka Mrs Hard, your host Today. I'm super excited to have my really good friend, business collaborator and photographer, lisa Fonville, with me on the show today. Lisa, the owner of Hemlock House Inc. Is more than just a photographer and branding expert. She creates soulful art that is only possible because of the deep connections she forms with her clients and the journey she undertakes with them before they even step in front of the camera. Trust me from personal experience, she is incredible and she makes you feel so comfortable in front of the camera. And Lisa is an old soul. She brings people together through photography, business branding and spiritual retreats.
Speaker 1:In this episode, we're going to talk about embracing the ebbs and flows in business, something her and I are both very familiar with as entrepreneurs and business owners. We're going to talk about understanding and accepting the various seasons of life in your business the slow times, when it feels like you're not making enough money and you're concerned about what you're going to do in the future to keep your business afloat. And then the busy times where you are running around like a chicken with your head cut off and you wish you had more time. We're going to talk about reducing work-related anxiety and creating a healthier work-life balance, which, as you know, is a journey and a process in itself, and it's vital for caregivers and female entrepreneurs. We also have a super exciting announcement we are hosting an upcoming event called Empower Her High Tee Embrace your Worth and Cultivate Confidence. This workshop will be on July 21st from 3 to 5 pm in downtown Napa.
Speaker 1:This special event is designed for women entrepreneurs, business owners and those contemplating starting a business. We're going to be focusing on releasing business anxiety. We're going to talk about what to do when your business is slow, when you feel like people aren't spending money and the financial struggle you're feeling is real. There are some core underlying issues that are limiting you and blocking you from finding peace in those seasons that are slow, and these real core issues are keeping you from embracing your worth and feeling confident in your business. So we're going to dive into that together at Empower Her High Tea.
Speaker 1:And this isn't just a workshop. It's also a tea ceremony, and the tea ceremony portion is hosted by Sakan Neck, and she is also a photographer, she's also an entrepreneur and she creates a very soulful tea ceremony experience that we are so excited to share with you. And you're going to receive so many benefits from joining us at Empower Her High Tea, including creating community support. You're going to be able to meet other women just like you who are going through similar challenges and have similar goals. This workshop is going to be confidence building. You're going to learn tools and techniques to boost your self-worth and confidence, and bonus attendees will receive $100 off the upcoming Poppy and Quill Retreat on August 23rd and 24th, and you'll get a follow-up free 30-minute coaching session with me, yours truly, mrs Hard.
Speaker 1:So join us for an afternoon of inspiration, connection and empowerment. For more details and to register, visit the link in the show notes or you can find it on my website, mrshardcom. Now, without further ado, let's dive into this week's episode the Art of Balanced Living for business babes. With Lisa Vaughnville, let's talk about how we met.
Speaker 2:Okay, we met in 2017. The reason that I remember the exact year is because that's the year I did my first destination wedding in Mexico and it was so awesome. But like a month before, I couldn't even lift my camera. Something was wrong with my arms. I had like either tennis elbow or golfer's elbow, or if you've ever had either of those, it sucks. And I was freaking out because I wasn't going to be able to edit this wedding. And then my sister-in-law told me that she had this incredible new renter on her property and she had gotten a massage from you. And she was like, oh my God, lisa, you have to go, you have to try her. And I was like, all right and right. And then you, I did, and then you fixed my arms and every once in a while, I feel that pain come back and and I mean, I see you frequently, um, but you always fix it you're like an angel.
Speaker 1:Subscapular work is one of my most favorite techniques digging into people's armpits because because you like to hurt people. No, I don't like to hurt people. I love the relief that they feel afterwards it's amazing.
Speaker 1:It's like night and day it was and it's something no one ever thinks yeah, and it's something that no one ever thinks about that like that is actually the root cause of a lot of shoulder discomfort in the armpit and if you hit the right spots that, it like releases the pec muscles which get tight from like forward head movement or forward head posture and like rounded shoulders. There's this like whole cascade of events and I think my favorite thing in massage therapy and in like wellness coaching is getting to like the root or like the true symptom, the cause of the problem that is causing all of these other symptoms.
Speaker 2:you're very good at that, because every time I mention anything you're like you pose this about and it always leads us to the root and it's like so good, I'm like okay, and now I know like what questions you're going to ask me, because I've worked with you enough that it actually I ask myself the same questions, which is such a benefit for like coaching and these workshops that you do, because I find myself asking myself these questions before I know that I'm going to see you. Not like homework or anything, but it's like built in, it's like this natural practice now, and so I can pinpoint the source of anxiety or fear much quicker than I used to be able to do.
Speaker 1:Oh, and that lights up my soul, like, especially as a coach, because you don't want to be the person that, like the person, has to have to fix their problems. Like, my dream is for the people I work with to feel empowered so that they can find their own solutions from within them. Feel empowered so that they can find their own solutions from within them.
Speaker 2:Well then, what you're doing is working.
Speaker 1:That's so awesome. I love hearing that.
Speaker 2:Thank you, my little knowledgeable angel.
Speaker 1:Aw.
Speaker 2:Yeah, but I can't fix my subscap stuff, my scapular.
Speaker 1:Is it sub Scap, subscapular muscle, scapular? You have to do that for me still Is that cool, that's great. I love working on your subscapular muscle. Are we flirting? We might be. Oh my God, don't let my husband listen.
Speaker 2:Oh gosh.
Speaker 1:So let's let's talk about your business. What has been lighting your fire lately?
Speaker 2:oh, that's such a hardcore question because I feel, uh, really tired right now and I know a lot of people that I've talked to are feeling the same way and I'm sure it's just a combination of, you know, our economy and pricing and stress and time and um, it's just, it feels a little draining. Um, it's just it feels a little draining, but my clients always light me right back up. It's amazing to have a job or an occupation that I think about this all the time and I'm so grateful that truly like pulls me out of a funk which, like who can say that? That's amazing. So when I'm at my lowest and I'm kind of not feeling super inspired, as soon as I'm with clients and I have a camera in my hand, everything's great. So I just have to trust that it come.
Speaker 2:I used to do a lot of collage work when I was painting back in the day and then I used to just keep these little gems from magazines and articles that I would cut out and I kept them all in this box and I found it the other day and it was really interesting to to like connect with my former self and see, like what I was connecting with then and how it's either still applies now or it feels so far away. It was just a very interesting little journey, but that is something that I've been practicing this year is going over past work when you're feeling in a little rut, and that's been really, really helpful.
Speaker 1:What parts of that have been helpful, because I know for me, when I go over past work or like old ideas or old projects that I had in the past, I can see how much I've grown since then and that can be really inspiring, because sometimes I feel a little stagnant, like I'm not growing. What is it for you that?
Speaker 2:It's definitely that. But it's also kind of there's this period of time I don't know when it was, but I felt like I was just on fire. And I actually look at it now and I feel like my work has gotten way worse. I was talking to a friend the other day and she's like, um, you're crazy. And I'm like but I look at this past stuff and I'm like, oh my gosh, look at these ideas I was having like this is so cool and like I did that, that's awesome. Um, so it's just kind of reaffirming that, like that is within me and I just like gotta dig a little to find it. But it's also just age slowing down, tired. My oldest just graduated from high school. That was like wild. I'm finally recovering from like two weeks of massive amounts of social activity.
Speaker 1:Yeah last time we were hanging out we were talking about seasons in business and learning to be confident when your business has seasons.
Speaker 2:And embracing the lull. Yes, I keep saying that over and over. Since we've talked, I've used that exact phrasing like seven times with seven different people that have been reaching out. Like a little discouraged, I'm like no man Embrace it. Yeah, I don't say it creepy, like a little discouraged, I'm like no man embrace it. Yeah, I don't say it creepy like that, though it's pretty creepy.
Speaker 1:I feel like those lulls show up for us to rest and recover, but we're so used to going, going, going and believing that that's what we need to do all the time to be productive, to be successful, to be making money to. You know, whatever the thing is where it's actually the time to hibernate, even if it is like spring or summer, and go within so that you can recharge and then come out with new ideas, new stuff, because you can't pull from a well that's dry, you can't pull from a well that's dry.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's what I'm just keep practicing, and every time I embrace the law it gets easier and easier to do until it becomes kind of a a habit of like not freaking out. Cause, as a business owner, I've been seeing all these memes or these videos, you know, that pop up on Instagram. There's like it's talking about two, the two phases of a business owner, and it's one of the videos is like Ron Swanson from Parks and Rec, just like freaking out. And the other one is like because you're so busy and overwhelmed. And then the other one is like freaking out because like the well is dry and you have nothing going on. So my goal is to live in the middle of those. You know, kind of the little up and downer.
Speaker 2:I was actually out to dinner on Wednesday with a friend. I love her, her name's Cece. She's from Sweden. Like she said, wednesdays are like the mini weekend in Sweden. She had another word for it and then it's just like known that like people get off early on Wednesdays, they like take a break, they chill out, and I'm like I don't know why we can't do that as like a society, and on one hand, on one hand, it's very interesting having teenagers and young people entering the work world right now and, you know, feeling pretty entitled.
Speaker 2:You know feeling pretty entitled, even though we've raised them to not be that way, but you know, and expecting certain pay levels when we're like, dude, our first job was like $3 an hour. Like, come on, you're complaining about 20? Like you're 16. Like it's crazy to me, 16, like it's crazy to me. But on one hand, that generation is also like not glorifying the hustle and they are. There is this whole generation that's focusing more on mental health and physical health and physical well-being, which leads to mental well-being. Overall, I do think that generation is going to be happier in a sense.
Speaker 2:Um, and it's just balancing that with you know, what we grew up thinking you work really hard and then you die. So there's, there's gotta be, there's gotta be something in the middle.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I was talking with a client this morning actually, and we were talking about how there's like all these and thens, like she went to college and then she got her PhD, and then she opened up her business and then she saved enough money for retirement, and then, and now she's like what am I supposed to do?
Speaker 1:now, there's no more and then yeah, then you do whatever you want, which is awesome but really hard to embrace if you've always had a goal, and a lot of us fall prey to the idea that comes from our mind and from our culture that, like, once we do these things, then we will be happy, then we will be satisfied, then we will be stable, then we will be secure. But what about the now? Like there is a way and I experienced this that you can experience joy now, you can experience peace of mind now, you can experience happiness now. It doesn't have to be the and then and then.
Speaker 1:Sometimes, when you talk about that, people get into like black and white thinking where they think but if I do that and I do what I want right now, like nothing's going to get done, like it's either all I have to keep on chasing or nothing, or like I completely stop everything instead of like learning to infuse joy into the process and fall in love with the process instead of the end result and doing what you need to do in the moment to create balance, or in the day to create balance. Like I've been a big fan of mini naps lately, me too, and it makes such a big difference, but it took me so long to be able to give myself permission to do that and have it not be. No, I have all these things to do. Like once I do all these things, then I can rest. It's like actually I'm dragging.
Speaker 1:I don't feel great.
Speaker 1:If I just lie down for 10 minutes or 15 minutes and then do the things I need to do, I'm going to feel so much better and we feel so much less stress and I've been like lying down and just focusing on like releasing resistance and I've been really playing with the feeling of resistance.
Speaker 1:It's like this force feeling that I feel in my body and that force feeling has been tied to my anxiety for so long and I've been working with a therapist to like identify that like very specific feeling, that driving, running, exhausted, depleted part of myself, and I've been learning that like what soothes that part for me is like letting go of that forcing feeling and I have to like lie down to do it and I don't have to lie down very long, which is the really cool part. I can like reset within like five or 10 minutes or like 15 minutes, and so it doesn't have to like take up my whole day, but it like allows my nervous system to let go so that I can then do things, but with like a different momentum behind them, like a different energy.
Speaker 2:I think your resistance and my resistance probably hang out often, but no, every single thing you just said I resonated with in a very real way, like every single thing you said. So, yes, even the resistance, resistance, feeling the whole all or nothing. Um, I'm still in the process of like giving myself permission to do that.
Speaker 2:I feel like I'm going a little bit overboard and giving myself too much permission to like nap now, but, um, my body needs it, my body's tired, so I'm really focusing on that. But, yeah, it's this, for a really long time, I mean, I couldn't even create and this was, I mean, years and years and years. I would have, like I used to paint a lot. I've really been thinking about getting back into painting and and bringing some of that fluidity and flow back into my creative practice. I think it would be really helpful and just healing.
Speaker 2:But I would have it set up in this corner of my house and unless I had done every other thing done the dishes, vacuumed the house, cleaned the room, like everything was done then I would give myself permission to actually go paint and create. Therefore, I never actually did it. I mean, I maybe painted in that space like three times. Did you ever flip flop it where you painted and then did the things? No, but I would do that now that I have learned a lot about myself and that for really highly creative people, creating is like the life force, like that's what's going to give me energy to like do everything else in life. Yeah, so now I get that, but at the time I would feel guilty or I would feel like I hadn't deserved that that time for myself and, um, that's just sad. I don't want anybody to feel like that. If you were feeling like that, let's talk, yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah, but it, our brain, tells us that that's the way we need to do it, because it's like frivolous or a waste of time, or it's like a treat or a luxury to do that. Where it's really backwards because, like when we take time to do those things and it doesn't mean we have to take an entire day to paint, like we can take like 20 minutes or an hour or like a chunk of time, like once you fuel that part of your soul, everything else flows, so you get all of your stuff done faster, rather than like trying to like squeeze juice out of a like sun-dried lemon it's so interesting that it takes so much work and so long to to like figure out these things that it feels like they should be so simple.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:I don't know.
Speaker 1:I think it's like we just make things harder in our mind than they need to be and we put responsibility ahead of joy.
Speaker 2:I wonder why we all suffer from such anxiety.
Speaker 1:And the root is fear, fear of instability because of, you know, bad childhoods or financial insecurity that happened in the past or bad experiences in the past. And our brain is actually trying to help us by keeping us on the go instead of doing something creative or nurturing ourselves, because it made an agreement somewhere along the line that, like doing the thing and pushing hard and forcing is what's going to equal success and praise and achievement, not nourishing yourself first and then like moving from a place of fulfillment.
Speaker 2:Well, I think that then poses the next big question is what does success mean to you and to your, to everybody, if you have a business, if you're starting starting a business, like if you've never sat down and written down what that means, like that can be in itself such an eye-opening practice. Like success for me means time, like time to go hang out in my garden and be with my family and come record a podcast with Alessandra when I want to or when she asks me, which I love doing, and, um, just you know, if I want to go have lunch with a friend, like we can go, do that. And to make my own schedule and to create every day like, oh my God, um. And to connect with people. I mean when I really sit and actually I needed this today, so thank you, um when I really sit down and I look at what I've defined success for myself and in my business, for I'm already very successful and that's awesome. That's awesome. Go me, go you. I would like to make like a billion dollars.
Speaker 1:Let's get real, really, really easily.
Speaker 2:So if we could manifest that, that would be great.
Speaker 1:Yeah, but even the billion dollars okay, like let's say that's your goal.
Speaker 1:What is that really? It's a feeling of freedom. It's a feeling of stability, it's a feeling of nothing being impossible or out of your league financially, like. It's a feeling that, like, people want to achieve by becoming a billionaire. You're right, and so this is backwards and maybe people won't want to hear it, but I don't, I don't know. But what I've been working on lately is like why don't I just have that feeling now, like why don't I work in the morning, during my morning routine, and through the day when I'm releasing resistance?
Speaker 1:What I'm working on is like accessing those feelings Now, the feeling of freedom that I have in my life right now, the feeling of joy I have, the feeling of stability, the feeling of security and focusing on what I do have instead of what is lacking. And it's such a simple practice and it doesn't mean that then I don't try to go make money or don't try to grow my business, but it comes from like a place of joy and fun and let's see if this works, you know. Or like, let's see if we can help people in this way, or let's see if we can connect with people in this way, rather than that forcing feeling of like lack that I think that you know the universe's law of attraction like what you're putting out, you're receiving, and so like what if you just have the feeling? And then if the billion dollars comes, great Might be a little too floaty.
Speaker 2:It's not that floaty, it's like dressing for the job you want. Yeah, you know, it's that similar. Like you know, I saw something online that hit me in the gut and it was just the whole. Whatever you're not changing, you're choosing.
Speaker 1:Yes, oh, my God, I love that and I was like oh, so I'm choosing to be like.
Speaker 2:And then it kind of went down the list of these things I'm choosing and I was like oh my God, I just. It hit me really hard and I was thinking about it when you were talking about the billionaire thing. I'm going to start living like I'm a billionaire too. You want to go to Ireland tomorrow? Let's chase that joy.
Speaker 2:No I understand what you're saying perfectly and I think so much of it is mindset and changing. That doesn't come overnight. No, it's a practice. It's such a practice and it's a lot. It's a long one and I know everybody talks about their healing journey and it makes fun of everybody for talking about their healing journey.
Speaker 2:But I don't care who you are. If you're like trying to be better for you, for your, for your kids, for your, it should be for you and for future generations. You are on a healing journey and this is part of it and pinpointing like where these things started and it's. It's brave to do all of that and it's really hard sometimes.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I think. I think we beat ourselves up too much.
Speaker 2:I think we do too.
Speaker 1:I think our lives work in like, I imagine like circles, like cycles, instead of a linear thing. Like so often, we want to just like check that box, tuck whatever we were dealing with like neatly away and be like okay, I've dealt with that, it's never going to bother me again. But things happen in seasons and they come back in cycles and when they come back, we have a new opportunity to interact with it differently, because we've learned things from it the last time it came around, from it the last time it came around, or if it continues to show up in our lives, it's continuing. It's the universe's way of like continuing to nudge us of like hey, this is something you need to look at.
Speaker 1:And what I love is like when one problem is focused on, it creates a ripple effect in the rest of your life, and so it's not like we have to fix all of the problems.
Speaker 1:We can just like pay attention to whatever is loudest and then we can work on that one thing. And if we really set aside time to understand it, accept it, make peace with it and find some serenity around it, then those same tools, whatever we learned from that experience, can be applied to multiple different areas. For example, like my relationship with my father was like really bad for a couple of years there, like really bad, but he taught me a lot about boundaries by working on that relationship with him and then those boundaries trickled into my business. I have really good boundaries with clients when I answer texts and respond in emails Like I don't have to immediately respond, especially if it's a day off. I have better boundaries around days off. I have better boundaries around my expectations of other people personally and professionally, and that all came from working on my relationship with my dad, because that was affecting all these different areas of my life.
Speaker 2:And I've been lucky enough to witness that and like be a part of your life during that process. But just hearing you talk about that relationship now versus a few years ago and like but just hearing you talk about that relationship now versus a few years ago and like it's just I don't know. It's really beautiful and I'm sure your relationship with him is so much better now because of it and that's important.
Speaker 1:Good job. Thanks friend. Thanks friend, you're welcome. Thanks friend, thanks friend, you're welcome. So let's talk a little bit about branding. What do you?
Speaker 2:see women struggling with the most when it comes to branding, being seen really, or allowing themselves to be seen. I think that's the very first thing and I think a lot of that is generational, and this idea that you know, we're not meant to be seen, we're not meant to take up space and like who am I? To like schedule a photo session for myself and like, let people know, like here I am and here's what I do, and get to know me like it's. It's, it's a matter of um, feeling worthy and allowing yourself to be seen, which then you know, is like. I find that that's like the cornerstone and I've worked with a lot of women that once we've done that part and I've worked with a lot of women that once we've done that part and there slowly becomes this more comfort level and it's just mind blowing what happens.
Speaker 2:But I think there's this intense fear of being seen because either fear of rejection or not being good enough. But that's what I see women struggling with the most as far as branding goes. You know it's pretty fluid after that To conquer that or not conquer it, but to work through that feeling and give yourself permission to like, do these things. I mean that's not like a week long process either. That's years, which is actually why you know we've worked with some of the same clients coaching and branding and it's why your what you do is so important to feed what I do, and vice versa. I think, and um, in order to really feel comfortable allowing yourself to be seen, you have to do some of this, some of the stuff, that that you provide and that, the help that, and then, once people get there, it's just amazing what happens.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you're just like wow it's.
Speaker 2:It's like watching I don't know the only thing I can really think of is like butterflies which I'm not a huge butterfly person, but you know the whole art of transformation and really there's something.
Speaker 1:There's something about that and it's really amazing to watch and it makes me cry every time to watch women step into their power like that watch women step into their power like that, yeah, and I feel like being an entrepreneur or being a business owner, owning your own business, is going to challenge everything that you have going on within. That makes you feel like you're an imposter or not good enough for comparing yourself to others, Like that's what your business will do. And if you're listening and you're a business owner, you probably really need to prepare for this. But also you need to know that you're not the only one that feels this way, that every single person you see out there showing their face on their website on Instagram during workshops, whatever, showing their face on their website on Instagram during workshops, whatever they have all felt this and are most likely feeling it still Agreed, and it doesn't mean that like it has to totally go away for you to make peace with it.
Speaker 1:But I love what you offer people because you are so excited during photo shoots with people and you're so creative when you're helping others with branding and you're able to really get to their essence through your photography and the way that you work with them and help them light up and see themselves, and I know that everyone I've talked to who's ever looked at their photos that they've received from you is just like oh my God, this is so amazing. I feel so beautiful, I feel so seen and I feel so honored, and they also feel so authentically connected to themselves. Like you take photographs of people in a way that really brings out their like authentic beauty. It's not like a posed, like like perfectly primmed, like kind of thing. It's really capturing their essence, which is more beautiful than perfection.
Speaker 2:Thank you, and that's not something that just like happens. By the way, if you are a photographer and you're listening and you're like new on the scene or whatever, I don't just show up and like connect with people like this. I mean, I connect with people easily, but the reason that this that a lot of these are successful and the way you're describing is because we've spent significant time talking and talking about what their goal for their business is, how they wish to be seen, who their ideal client is. I mean so many questions that they have never even asked themselves, and that shapes the way that I photograph them and the whole session.
Speaker 2:And so it's really important to really get to know your clients in that way and what they're trying to achieve and what the message that they want to speak and and share, um, otherwise you're not gonna you're not gonna get that authentic joy and what you're describing, um, so it's just a matter of connecting with people prior. You know, people want to be seen, they want to be heard, they want to feel like you've heard them, they want to know that you've heard them and they want communication and follow through and those are, like moving on to like other parts of business. The reason that I have clients that keep coming back and you have clients that keep coming back year after year is because I connect with my clients and I follow through and I communicate, and there's just so many incredible artists and people that create these photographs all over the our valley and all over the world and, um, a lot of people can do that. Um, but it's like what Maya Angelou said people are going to remember how you make them feel yeah, yeah and I think that's.
Speaker 2:I just think about that quote all the time.
Speaker 1:Yeah, in talking about empowering women, we've created a special event that we're going to throw on July 21st from 3 to 5 PM. It's called empower her high tea and it's for women entrepreneurs or women who are thinking about starting a business, when we're going to dive into the art of embracing your worth and cultivating confidence.
Speaker 2:So Sakon Neck is a photographer in Napa. I met her. She came to our very first Poppy and Quill retreat and neither Kelly or I knew her and we're like, who is this person? This is awesome. And she instantly became one of my favorite humans ever. Like I laugh so hard with this. She is incredible, um, but she has a little tea house also in Napa. She does so many very cool things and does a lot of cooking to honor ancestors and like she just does some very cool things. And she will be hosting a tea ceremony at the beginning of this event and I'm so excited about it, one I just really want you to meet her. I want everyone to meet her. I want everyone to meet you. But she said the tea ceremony part will last probably 45 minutes and then we'll we'll dive into the kind of getting to to know each other.
Speaker 2:You know, being a business owner and working primarily from home when you're not shooting or with clients can be really lonely. I mean, I can't talk to my spouse about any of my business stuff. He's crazy. He's just such a realist. You know, I call him my dream killer. He's so great. I'm so in love with him. I call him my dream killer. He's so great, I'm so in love with him. But and that was something early on in my business journey also that I really needed to create boundaries with and we're going to have a whole one on boundaries also and client relations and balancing family and work life there's a whole bunch of different categories that we would like to address during these little afternoon shindigs, and it's just really a gathering of minds and creating a little community and lifting each other up and referring people.
Speaker 1:And, yeah, creating connection.
Speaker 1:And then also, this one's going to be creating a framework in terms of like. If you want to learn more about branding, igniting your own business of fire and finding your flow, if you're feeling like you're in a funk or you're not feeling creative, and how to tap into that like true you essence that you want to convey, because it's so easy to look at other people and think that they're doing it so much better than you and to feel like there's a thousand of you know, name your profession, like why am I standing out? Like why would people want to choose me? And that is a limiting belief that can be completely debunked because it is.
Speaker 2:And limiting beliefs is something that that you have really brought to my forefront of my mind many times. I would love to talk more about that at one of these things.
Speaker 1:Yeah Well, we're going to talk about limiting beliefs around self-worth and confidence at this event and we're going to talk about simple tools that you can use to release that stress, release that anxiety, release that imposter syndrome, release that comparison syndrome. Because, like Lisa said, like when you start working on that, it can be a long process, but it's also like a cyclical process in which you go through seasons where you have like a lot of aha moments around it and you learn a lot of new things and feel connected to yourself once again and, you know, feel inspired. And then, like you know, maybe it'll come up again where you have imposter syndrome because you're reaching a new level in your business or you're putting yourself out there to try something new, you know. But then you can look back and be like, oh, I used these tools to work through that in the past and I can apply these tools again, and then you'll learn more from that. And it's an opportunity to grow and to really reconnect with yourself.
Speaker 1:Because, in my experience, when I'm not feeling confident, when I'm feeling unworthy, it's because I've forgotten who I am and I forgot that it doesn't matter what other people are doing. All that matters is that I'm true to myself and my path and connecting with the guidance in my life. Because when somebody does that, others can sense it. Just that change in vibration, other people can sense it and for me that's what keeps me in flow that trust, that connection, that authenticity and understanding that there's ways that you can access it. There's things you can do to call it in Even if you're not feeling it. You don't have to just live in the world of like I'm not good, I'm not worthy and I'm stuck like this forever. Like I'm not good, I'm not worthy and I'm stuck like this forever.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and finding and acknowledging those things that you can do to call yourself back. I mean, I have a whole list of things. I'm like, all right, I'm feeling very, very blah blah. I have to go for a walk and take pictures of flowers, and then I do it and I come back and I'm like like I'm so much better yeah, these tiny, tiny little things.
Speaker 2:I have to go sit in the garden for 10 minutes and then changing the whole. I have to to wow I have this incredible garden that I get to go sit in. I mean, I find myself constantly correcting myself when I'm feeling in a little funk. Or I'll go and edit pictures from my, like family vacation that I never get to. You know little little stuff and you're like, oh, just these tiny little practices to re-engage my like, relight my fire.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so if this sounds like it's for you, we'd love to have you join us. There'll be a link in the bio. There'll also be a link on my website, mrshardcom and hemlockhouseinc.
Speaker 2:There will be a link there as well.
Speaker 1:And we would love to meet you, connect with you, to help you feel empowered, worthy and cultivate confidence. And again, that's on Sunday, july 21st, from 3 to 5 pm. We want to hear about all the magic that you're doing, and that you are yes, and if you're not feeling it, if you're like no, I need to go to get my magic. We can't wait to see what magic comes up for you you're gonna say something magical.
Speaker 1:I know it, and then I'm gonna be like, oh my gosh, there it is, and you're gonna be like what?
Speaker 2:it's great, it's real fun one of our favorite things ever is to just be hype women, I think yeah like I love it so much yeah, I have a hard time being hyped when people hype me. Ah, we're working on accepting. You know that I receive, I receive, but that's like you know, we're doing a. We're also doing a poppy and quill retreat in aug.
Speaker 1:August August 23rd and 24th.
Speaker 2:August 23rd and 24th in Calistoga and Alessandra will be hosting some workshops. Kelly, my co-host, and I will be doing portraits underwater portraits, in the pool portraits. We have outdoor mineral baths, which are awesome.
Speaker 1:And these portraits aren't just your normal photograph sessions. Lisa and Kelly actually set up a spiritual experience leading up to these photographs and so that you're in your most beautiful, ignited, heightened state when you get these photographs taken, and it reminds you of the journey that you experienced during the retreat when you look back on these photos, of how good you felt, how connected you felt to yourself, how connected you felt to others and these magical spiritual experiences that they lay out. And every retreat's a little bit different, but everyone just feels so full of joy and has so many aha moments after the retreat experience.
Speaker 2:Thank you, that's very sweet. Even I look back on the photos that we took of other people during these retreats. I look at them all the time, not like creepily, but you know, like creepily, but you know, and I feel that way every time, like I feel like my vibration is raised just from like revisiting that space in that period of time in my mind and it completely changes my day. Like every time, yeah.
Speaker 2:Anyways we're so excited. We can't wait to see who comes to this one. We have a few spots taken, a few spots left.
Speaker 1:Shauna Mox is going to be there. Shauna's going to be there, and.
Speaker 2:Shauna is an embodiment coach. She's gone through some changes in her business in the last year and it's been really beautiful to watch from afar. But she came to our retreat last year and this woman moves like you've never seen man.
Speaker 1:She really I don't want to give too much away, but she takes people through practices that are ancient shaking practices to heal and release stress and to reconnect with yourself and move in a way that makes you feel really good and move in, and specifically geared towards women and where we store memories and all of these things and it's just the overall experience was like mind blowing to me.
Speaker 2:But she will be back and I swear having you guys both there. It's like a dream team situation in this beautiful location it's in calistoga it's in calistoga.
Speaker 2:We're walking to dinner and it always feels like doesn't it always feel like like a week yeah it feels like I mean, it's two days and by the end of the second day I'm like wow, we've been here for like 10 days yeah, because so much happened and it's amazing, but so much happens and in such a short period of time. And then we come home and I'm like, did, did that even actually happen? Because it feels so surreal. It's really difficult to explain what happens actually, which makes it really difficult to market.
Speaker 1:Yes, they talk about the Poppy and Quill retreat. It is a moving and empowering and energizing experience and they usually say it's just what I needed and it really creates a lot of clarity.
Speaker 2:Or it's what I didn't know that I needed in that moment, and it was like life changing. Yes.
Speaker 1:It changes the trajectory of the participants that go, because spirit shows up, these amazing women who hold space show up and it just gives people time and the in the space to really sink into whatever the universe is calling them to look at and to release it and to change it and to do whatever needs to be done with it. And it's just a bright spot in everyone's memory who's been to it before Like it's just above and beyond magical.
Speaker 2:Thank you. You do that, we all do that. You do that, we all do that. I'm really excited.
Speaker 1:Me too, and as a bonus to our event that we're having, empower Her High Tea, if you go to Empower Her High Tea, you will receive $100 off Poppy and Quill registration when you sign up what? And a free coaching session with yours truly, mrs Hard. Yeah, girl, girl, so worth it, yeah. So there's a lot of bonuses, too, to get in on another quick, quick note about the poppy and quill retreat.
Speaker 2:For every person you bring with you, you also get a hundred dollars off of your ticket price. What, yeah, what. So you know you have a bestie, you got a bestie and a Tessie. You want a ring with you Boom, $100 off. And then she has a bestie, she wants a ring with her $100 off for her too. What I know.
Speaker 1:So I'm going to put a link to that in the show notes as well, and you can find more information if you follow Lisa Fonville at Hemlock House. Photo on Instagram.
Speaker 2:Yep and also poppyandquillcom, all spelled out. There's also a link to the Poppy and Quill page on my website, which is hemlockhouseinccom. We hope to see you.
Speaker 1:Yeah Well, thanks so much, Lisa, for joining me today. It's always so fun to do this with you.
Speaker 2:Thank you for having me. I feel like I just talk so much.
Speaker 1:That's what you're supposed to do. It's a podcast, yes, but thank you. I always love to see your face. I love to see yours. All right, till next time. Bye.